The S Practice

Exploring slowing down just enough to feel yourself meeting life and life meeting you.

• As you reach for something — your phone or a door handle — pause for one breath before you continue your movement. In that pause, lean your energy back inside. See how that shifts your action, thoughts, and body awareness.
• Perhaps you slow your pace of walking, chewing, driving, talking…waaaay down. What comes alive? What thoughts do you have (for example, if I chew this slow it’ll take me forever to finish..)

See if you can soften or gently release (some of the) tension you carry in the body.

Exhale… and let your shoulders drop. Perhaps you close your eyes for a few breaths. Soften your jaw and your lower belly. With your eyes closed, perhaps you take in the light that’s coming through your eyelids.

Sometimes the most important information or nourishing moments are experiences in the subtle realm.

• Notice something quiet — the feeling in your hands, or the air on your skin.
• Perhaps before rising you close your eyes and tune into what is alive as you begin your day.
• Perhaps it’s the subtle sensations you feel in your body while you wait for a meeting to start, before you start your car engine, as you’re in conversation with another.

Choose random moments to hold sacred, whether they fit the “definition” of such or not.

Find random, small moments in the mundane or everyday experience — in relationship to your body, your life, another, a conversation, an argument, etc.

• Perhaps warm water flowing over your vessel in the shower becomes sacred rather than functional.
• Perhaps clouds floating by in the sky or a bird singing becomes a part of your sacred landscape for the day.
• Perhaps you place your hand on your heart for one breath…and let the moment be enough…sacred even.

If you were to give yourself a sensory experience — something simple (and delicious if you like)…what might it be?

If you were to simplify a task, a day, a decision…what unnecessary or excess steps/actions might you release to simplify your experience?

Instead of waking up to the pressure of a 10 item to-do list (of which I already know I’m not going to achieve and therefore have built in disappointment, judgement and stress):

• I now have a 2 item check list. I complete those tasks thoroughly, celebrate the wins, and then recalibrate if there’s anything else on the list (as a bonus!) that I would like/can complete.

Where might you be holding on with a particularly tight grip? Is there a space inside of you that can allow just 2% less grip (need to be in control, right, confirmed, reassured, etc)

How might you feel where you are already supported, where you would like or need more support, and do you dare to give yourself what you need to feel more supported.

Even though I am particular about the way I like things cleaned in my house, I find myself without the energy to do so, more often than I’d like. So instead of stressing out about “not getting it done” or feeling uncomfortable in my own space, I have opted to hire a weekly house cleaning service. For $40 a week, I have opted to support my peace of mind, my physical energy, my relaxation and comfort when guests drop by for a visit. Because I know she comes weekly, I also have less stress throughout the week, because I know she’s coming every Wednesday. This has served me very well, in multiple ways.

If you slow down inside, where is your body feeling unsafe, unattuned or unattended. How might you bring your loving awareness to this place? How does your body respond to this attention?

Can you stay or return often to this place…until she feels safe enough to soften and open?

As we know, our sensitivity is not a flaw, but rather an intelligence in service to you and others.

On a couples coaching call a few days ago, my clients began by sharing how happy they were with their progress, their previous sessions, and the practices they had been integrating. And then, almost immediately, they moved into “what they wanted to address next.”

My sensitivity was quietly but clearly signaling: Celebrate!

Instead of moving into another processing session, I invited them to consider something different — to consciously celebrate (with me as a witness) as the sole focus of their session.

At first, they hesitated. They didn’t want to “waste” their paid time on celebration. (Old conditioning. Old code.)

But in the end they trusted my lead, and I ended up gently guiding them into a joyful, spontaneous, sensual celebration of their union — a space where they could truly be with their wins, their connection, and their growth with witness. In doing so, they not only experienced more joy and intimacy, but also began to learn the importance of pausing… of honoring what is working… of allowing more fun and connection into their relationship. They also really enjoyed being uplifted and celebrated by witness, rather than always being seen for “how courageous they are to be working on their relationship, etc”

In that moment, I allowed my sensitivity to lead — to guide them out of old code, and into a new way of supporting their connection and progression. It was a wildly nourishing call for them, but also for me!

What are simple ways you might come into quiet within?

What does it look and feel like to be grounded, steady and resourced? What are the most simple embodied reminders of this emotional, energetic and physical posture?

Where can you peel back defense, “assertiveness” and/or “boundaries” to very simply embody your truth?

There are moments where something or someone unexpected enters my field and I can feel that it can distract, disorient or bring up defense. When I feel this “disembodiment” occur, I will often pause, close my eyes, feel myself in my seat, lengthen my spine and then return to the moment with spaciousness around the trigger and a more relaxed posture in my yes or no.

You belong to yourself. If you were to ask of yourself in various moments throughout your day…“What feels true for me right now?” what might you discover about yourself and the life you’re living inside of?